Live the life you've dreamed." - Henry David Thoreau

Help!! In search of role models!!

Live the life you've dreamed.

One of the things that intrigues and saddens me is the transition I note in the medical records of a young girl as she grows into womanhood.
Initially most girls attend the GP for simple coughs and colds. All is rosy. A little paracetamol makes everything alright. She is her parents’ cute little thing with no cares in the world. She skips about the clinic curious about everything, as healthy as can be. The snuffly nose is likely viral and not needing anything done other than paracetamol for a slight fever.

She attends again just as she starts puberty. She is with mum and suddenly she needs 6 months of antibiotics to keep her acne at bay. No matter how I reassure her that her spots are an expected outcome of growing up and nothing to worry about she is adamant that they are ruining her life and must be fixed ASAP.

Four months down the line, we are discussing contraception and she seems to have turned into this stranger who can barely smile. Her heavy and inexpertly applied mascara discloses that she is getting initiated into womanhood. Who is this male that will not let our little girl enjoy the simplicity of girlhood? I miss her innocence!

How can I tell her that it’s just too early to start ingesting all sorts of hormones?

How can I make her understand that this is the time to study and build a solid foundation for her future? I mention gently that she doesn’t have to feel obliged to have sex at 14 years but she looks strangely at me and huffs ‘I am the only one not having sex yet in my class!’

She visits me all the time now. She keeps forgetting to take her contraceptive pill, she can’t stand the contraceptive injection, ‘Wouldn’t it make me fat?’ She screams when I suggest it.

‘The coil then?’

‘No! I don’t want anything down there!’

‘What of an implant in your arm?’

‘Does it hurt?’ she asks fingering the tiny rod I have shown her.

‘No we will numb the area and pop it in. You won’t feel a thing.’ She is happy with that.

I ask about school.

‘They are nuts!’ She replies.

She attends again. I smile when I see her name on my screen. I call her into the consulting room. She walks in with ‘my boyfriend.’

‘Who?!’ I silently scream.

‘Where is mum?? Who is this boyfriend?’

I keep my questions to myself and force myself to listen.

The tests are back. My little no-longer-so little girl has Chlamydia! I am furious but cannot show it. I give them both treatment and sternly explain the importance of using condoms with new sexual partners.

I wonder again about school.

She is wearing her school uniform concealed under a jacket that looks like a man’s one. I notice it is creased and slightly too short and too tight for her. Does she look tired or is it my imagination? Has she been home at all? I wonder.

She attends two weeks later, unable to pee.

‘What’s wrong?’

‘It is so sore and I have got rashes all over my pussy!’

She has Herpes this time around. ‘Boyfriend needs to be treated as well,’ I explain as I pass a catheter to drain her bladder.

‘Stupid man! He left me! ‘Her Lips quiver as she tries not to burst into tears.

‘Sorry to hear that.’

I am silent as I finish up and remove the catheter.

She is back in three weeks. We can’t find her period!!

‘What of the implant?’

‘Oh I attended last month and took it out.’

‘Seriously?! But I thought boyfriend was at large….’

‘I have a new partner. He is so gorgeous! We are going to have a baby’ she explains excitedly.

I am completely stunned.

I prescribe folic acid and book an appointment for the midwife.

I feel foolish for asking about school. I don’t want to dampen her joy. Am I old fashioned? Have the times left me behind? At sixteen, I was neck deep into my Science books not necking with a bloke. The last thing on my mind then was having a baby.

She attends with her new bloke two weeks later. ‘We want a termination’ he explains. ‘We are not ready for a baby yet.’

She doesn’t say much. She clutches his hand as if it is her lifeline. I look at her and feel hopeless. Her mascara is smeared around her eyes that look so tired. She has been crying.

I need to be sure this is what she wants. She nods her agreement when I ask her directly. I desperately search for my little girl in the eyes that I look into. A stranger stares back at me. I arrange an appointment at the TOP clinic.

She returns not too long after. I anxiously look at the corridor as I let her into the consulting room. Surely she is not alone, is she?

She cries her heart out. I offer tissue after tissue. She has symptoms of mild depression. I counsel her. I recommend ‘Beating the blues’ ‘mood gym’ or what about a nice book at the library? ‘I don’t know where the library is,’ she replies.

I am about to suggest more but she cuts me short, impatiently.

‘My friends say I need antidepressants.’

Your friends!!? Are they doctors by any chance?

We reassess next week. She is adamant that only tablets will fix her mood. She will cut herself if I don’t do something.

‘Cut?’

She rolls up her sleeves and shows me tiny shallow cuts on her arm.

‘Why?’ I ask, ‘what will you do in summer when it’s time to wear short sleeves? How will you hide your self inflicted scars?’

I refer her to the psychiatrist.

She is started on medication.

It’s been twenty years.

My little girl has turned into a bitter hardened woman with alcohol as her closest companion.

We are trying to save what is left of her liver.

‘Please stop drinking so much,’ I plead.

‘Why?’ She spits.

I am on a home visit but there is nowhere to sit.

Clutter all over. I can easily count up to 10 empty bottles of beer.

‘What of work?’ I ask desperately hoping for a tiny ray of sunshine.

She laughs at my stupidity.

Her ‘friends’ come in.

‘Please leave now,’ she asks as the two men sweep off clutter from the sofa unto the floor so they can sit.

The three of them light up their cigarettes laughing at nothing. They seem like zombies.

I want to scream at them, to leave my little girl alone but as I open my mouth to speak, I gulp in smoke, I choke. My eyes burn. I feel like they are receding into the distance. I can still see them laughing but I can’t hear any sound. Am I going crazy?!

I run out into the street and greedily inhale some fresh air.

Sadness engulfs me. Longing for what should be threatens to overwhelm me.

When the call comes, I am not shocked. ‘We found her in a pool of vomit,’ says the police man. She may have choked on her own vomit, they think.

‘We need a doctor to come and PLE,’ he asks.

I find a reason not to go. I have a migraine. I plead with my colleague to go.

I want to remember her as she was many years ago. Bubbly, full of life, excited about everything… Not stone cold, covered in vomit.

RIP my little girl.

What can we do to keep our young girls from sliding into these patterns?

Where are the fathers?

Where are the mothers?

Where are the big sisters?

Where are the big brothers?

Where are the leaders?

Where are the heroes and heroines our girls can look up to?

It is indeed an epidemic of lack of decent role models.

How many more of our young people shall we lose before we find the role models?

—————————————————————————————————————

Dr Adaeze Ifezulike is a Family Physician/GP who is passionate about healthy lifestyles, weight management, optimising sexual health and wellbeing particularly among women and youths. She is the author of ‘Medicine abroad: compulsory for medics trained outside the western world’ https://amzn.to/2tUCdX6 and ‘Understanding contraception’, an Amazon Best seller.

A very emotional day for me…..

A 43-year-old lady came to the surgery complaining of tummy pain.
I asked all the usual questions and then proceeded to examine her tummy.
I knew instantly that she was pregnant though the tummy was still small.
‘You are pregnant,’ I said to her.
Wide eyed in shock, she shook her head vehemently:
‘That’s not possible!!!’
‘That’s not possible’ she repeated, ‘we have been trying for a baby for many years without success…..there’s NO way I could be pregnant!!!’
But she was pregnant as a simple test of her urine confirmed.
‘No way!! Can’t keep it’ she declared, ‘I want it removed.’

She was almost hysterical with shock.

‘What the f….!!’ she swore angrily.
‘Ok, take it easy.’
I tried to calm her down.
‘You don’t have to decide right now. Go home and think about it and come back in two days to see me, ok?’
‘Let me know what you want to do then.’

She was back two days later.
‘I will keep it,’ she sighed deeply.

Fast forward many months later, as I made my way through the crowded surgery waiting room, I heard someone calling me.

‘Doctor, doctor….’
I turned round and saw a stranger smiling at me with a baby in a buggy.

I smiled back, unsure who it was.
‘Don’t you remember me?’ She asked.
I shook my head apologetically.

With a few words she reminded me of our encounter.
With excitement she announced ‘This is the baby….I’ve had my gorgeous son!!!’
And it was indeed one of the cutest babies I had ever seen. The lady looked like a new woman, so visibly happy.

‘Thank you so much doctor,’ she enthused, giving me a warm hug, ‘Thank you so much!!’

We hugged tightly oblivious to the gaze from all the patients in the waiting room. I tried so hard to hold back tears of joy that pushed at the back of my eyes.
It was one of those defining moments when you decide that despite all the stress (and I can tell you that being a doctor is VERY STRESSFUL!!!) encounters like this make it worth it.

Adaeze x

 

All in a doctor’s day….

adaeze-profilepicjuly15Yet another emotional day for me…
Saw my very last patient at 7.45am. I was supposed to finish work at 8am having worked overnight.
I am tidying up when another name pops on the screen.
It is a young girl in her early 20s with painful period.
That should be easy, I think as I call her through, already dreaming of my warm bed.

So she tells her story of having a really painful period past three days. Both paracetamol and ibuprofen haven’t helped.

So I asked all the usual questions and then requested her to lie on the couch for examination.

Now this lady is big.
However when she lay down, her tummy was BIG. Very Big!
I placed my hand on it and looked at her.
‘Did you say you are on your period?’ I asked.
‘Yes and it’s been really painful.’

‘I think you are in labour,’ I replied.
‘You are pregnant.’

‘What? That’s not possible??! I have been having my periods.’

But a urine test confirmed she was indeed pregnant.
She sat there shocked.
She was adamant that she didn’t know.
She cried a little bit.

‘We need to get you to the labour ward’ I said gently.
‘You will need someone with you.’

She was here studying. Her parents were across the globe in the US.
‘What of your friends or flat mates?’

She wasnt keen to call anyone. I contacted labour ward and sent her over.

Fast forward 24 hours later, I call her to see how she is doing.

‘I have had my wee girl. It’s the cutest baby ever’, her voice tinkled down the phone.
I was genuinely happy for her.

Her flat mate was with her and her mum was on her way over to meet her unexpected grandchild.

I smiled as we chatted.
Forget UNI for the moment.
Forget how she was going to cope.
Forget all the upheavals this lovely addition to the world may bring.

It was heartwarming to know mother and child were both well despite not having any antenatal attention, no pregnancy vitamins, no preparation at all for its arrival.
It’s one day at a time.
All in a doctor’s day…

Adaeze x

The Slight Edge

Slightedge

The Slight Edge

Goodmorning Fabulous readers,
Last night I spent 1 hour reading a book called ‘Slight edge’.
I recommend it highly -it’s just a few pounds if you buy the kindle or eVersion of it.

The slight edge in a nutshell can be summarised as- if you have ever been successful at anything, look at what you did to be successful, repeat those steps and you WILL KEEP BEING SUCCESSFUL!!! It is that simple!
No mystery!
No catch!

I felt this was really relevant to healthcare professionals involved in helping people lead healthy lives and lose weight.

I support several women and men in my weight loss/healthy lifestyle program.
I teach my ladies (and gents!) this:

You have lost weight.
What did you do to lose weight?
What food choices did you make?
What type and amount of exercise did you do?

Just keep repeating the same steps and YOU WILL KEEP LOSING WEIGHT!!

No mystery nor magic!
Just continuing the same steps.
Repeat it today and tomorrow and the next….
In other words make it a lifestyle 👊
Have a fabulous day friends❤️

Dr Adaeze Ifezulike

ps: Are you are struggling with your weight or have weight related medical conditions such as Hypertension, Diabetes, Arthritis, Metabolic syndrome? Get in touch today!!  I want to help you. Health is Wealth!

6 weeks to a Fabulous you!!

Hello Friends,Just wanted to catch up with you as we are a few days into the New Year now. How’s it going so far?

Did you make some resolutions? If so, how are they going? Would you like some help in making them stick this time?

You see, that’s what I do and why I am different. For me, the nutrition stuff is important and I’ll of course teach you that and bust some myths in the process. The really juicy stuff though, is all in the mind!

Join us on our Six Week Reset challenge and we’ll help you uncover what’s been holding you back, and smash through to make that lasting change now.

We’d love to help you on your journey…

If you are overweight, suffer from Hypertension, Joint pains/Arthritis, Diabetes, chronic tiredness, lack of energy, poor sleep or just want to lead a healthier life,

SIGN UP TODAY, and save a massive £147! Making the cost to you just £50!!

Use this LINK now! (the promo code is already applied)

You won’t ever get a discount bigger than this… we just want to help as many people as possible make 2016 your year!

Hear what my client says:

“I was a good size 12-14 but after I had my son went to size 20-22! Everyone commented on how fat I looked, was called all sorts of derogatory names….but I always turned those comments into jokes.

This however was not a joke: The breathlessness, sleepless nights, bloating, taking antacids and muscle relaxants for my bladder on a daily basis were not fun at all!! Being a health professional I should have been embarrassed but I found all excuses to say how difficult losing weight was. I lied. Losing weight is so easy!!!!

I am so grateful for my union with Dr Adaeze- one of the most amazing people I have met in 2015! She has been very supportive and always very knowledgeable. God bless! I owe you sister!
I started my proper reset in early November. Resetting was the beginning of me loathing all bad foods, unhealthy carbs, cravings and appreciating a truly healthy meal. It was strange how much I started to crave for salads and soups, fish, chicken…instead of the usual poisons!

I now feel very healthy and light! NO MORE MEDICATION!!!

From 100kg, I am now 92kg in just 2 months!!

Resetting is the best gift you can give yourself. Being here is all what I needed to kick-start the weight loss.
I still have a very long way to go but how glad and lucky I am to be with you all! Without Dr Adaeze and everyone here, I wouldn’t have done it.” ~Healthcare professional

“All my clothes are now baggy and the old tight ones are now fitting me. For the first time in my suit career, I can now button my jacket easily” ~Professional in the Oil and Gas Industry.

“I started off at 101kg but now 88kg. I always had high blood pressure, fatigue due to anaemia and ulcer, so I had very ‘good’ excuses not to exercise but to eat.

Had my last 2 kids back to back and just never lost the baby fat but was left with a ‘kangaroo pouch’.

Now I am more alert. I used to always wake up tired and wanting to rest a bit more before getting up.That’s gone!! I literally wake up with a spring now” ~ mother of 4

I really hope you chose to join us on Monday 1st February as we start the journey- we look forward to helping you become the best version of yourself!

Your Six-Weeks to a fabulous YOU starts here

Our next Six Week Reset challenge this year starts on MONDAY 1st February!!

Now is your chance to sign up and be part of an already great group of people ready to make 2016 their best year! It’s time for you to join us!

See YOU at the TOP.

Warm regards,

Dr Adaeze Ifezulike.

 

 

DAMAGE LIMITATION PACKAGE: Happy HEALTHY Holidays 2015!

Gift of health

Its that season when we all feel merry and light. The season to party and rejoice with friends and family.

But you have to admit that no matter how into ‘healthy lifestyle’ you are, chances are that this is one time of year you kinda slip up or slack off a bit…

You will have ‘weight gain’ and ‘hangovers’ to worry about… unless you have a DAMAGE CONTROL plan to keep things in check.

Well, my friend Jon has come up with this brilliant DAMAGE LIMITATION PACK for you to control the damage you are likely to cause your body, during this festive season.

As another friend Tyler puts it, this package will ensure you “feel on top form everyday and you can still get into your little black dress or feel good to go again with the family or the lads on a night out.”


The Damage Limitation Pack Explained.

The ESSENTIALS – Your Multi-Vitamin/Mineral/Antioxidant combination of the highest quality. This plugs up EVERY nutritional gap your food contains especially at this time as we eat energy dense but nutrient poor foods. (Worth £42.50) Everyone should be on the Essentials as a baseline for optimal nutrition.

essentials

BIOMEGA – Simply Pure Fish Oil and the best there is. Most say they check for mercury, but that doesn’t mean they take it out. These guys do.

It’s the best anti-inflammatory you can take; it turns on your fat burning hormones, turns off your fat storage hormones.

Its superb for: healthy joints, brain development, skin, hair, nail and eye. It also supports arterial function and blood flow AND there’s some Vitamin D in there as well which we seriously lack over the winter months. (worth £22)

fish oil

HEPASIL – If you like a drink, THIS is the supplement for you. (worth £32)

This is your Liver Detox. Everything you consume, everything, goes via the liver for removal of toxins. This can cause your liver to be overworked and stressed if you’re not consistently eating the right things causing all sorts of damage, from poor sleep, mood, weight gain, fatigue, illness and much more.

An unstable liver that isn’t functioning properly because of a build up of toxins (poor foods and alcohol) could cause a wide variety of long term health issues.

hepasil

PROBIOTICS – Outstanding support for gut health containing the ‘good bacteria’ your body needs for proper digestion plus improved immunity. (worth £25)

probiotic

DIGESTIVE ENZYME – Absolutely necessary considering the digestive assault you are about to put yourself through in the coming weeks! This will take care of your bloating and feelings of fullness or bloating after eating. (worth £30)

digestive enzyme

So, if you would like to purchase this pack, for yourself or someone else, I’ve arranged an awesome discount for you. It would normally cost you £151.50 but now………..£136.50

(that’s JUST £4.55 a day)

SHIPPING IS FREE if you take up this offer anytime up til the 1st of January 2016!

You know you’re gonna splash out this xmas.

Doesn’t it make sense to divert some of that money towards something that could do you GOOD rather than HARM?

If you would like to take advantage of this Offer, please send me a private inbox message.

Alternatively click on each image to take you straight to the store to buy the items you want.

GIVE YOURSELF AND YOUR LOVED ONES THE GIFT OF HEALTH …

gift of health 2

Merry Christmas and a Fabulous new year from the Sexual Wellbeing Network!!

M.E.P Fit Woman

swn mep fit W

M.E.P means mentally, emotionally and physically fit woman.
At the Sexual wellbeing network, we firmly believe that women are the greatest assets of this century.
Whether a woman is a wife, mum, career woman, Vet, missionary or whatever, for her to maximise her potentials, she needs to be mentally, emotionally and physically fit.

The MEP Fit woman programs aim to encourage women to look beyond limitations and disappointments to a brighter future.
Anxiety, worry, guilt, hatred and such emotions are sometimes signs of a mentally and emotionally un-sound mind which will invariably affect one’s physical health.
Good evidence abound that a lot of physical illness have their root cause in mental and emotional imbalance within the individual.
So let go of ‘low level’ thinking such as self deprecation or under-valuing yourself and practice a ‘higher and empowering’ mental attitude that disciplines your emotions and invariably helps your physical health as well.

Watch out for a MEP Fit woman program coming to a location near you.

We have teamed up with the amazing Sunshine Mothers Club to present our next event on the 5th of September at Aberdeen.

It promises to be a life changing event, so SAVE THE DATE please 😀

More details soon!!

For enquiries, email: info@sexualwellbeingnetwork.com

 

Top Ten Women health issues

imageWe’ve come a long way since 1995–and it is time to celebrate women and their achievements. But it is also time to take stock of how women’s rights are fulfilled in the world –especially the right to health. Twenty years after countries signed pledges in the 1995 Beijing Declaration and Platform of Action, women still face many health problems and we must re-commit to addressing them.

Here are ten of the main issues regarding women’s health that keep me awake at night:

Cancer: Two of the most common cancers affecting women are breast and cervical cancers. Detecting both these cancers early is key to keeping women alive and healthy. The latest global figures show that around half a million women die from cervical cancer and half a million from breast cancer each year. The vast majority of these deaths occur in low and middle income countries where screening, prevention and treatment are almost non-existent, and where vaccination against human papilloma virus needs to take hold.

Reproductive health: Sexual and reproductive health problems are responsible for one third of health issues for women between the ages of 15 and 44 years. Unsafe sex is a major risk factor – particularly among women and girls in developing countries. This is why it is so important to get services to the 222 million women who aren’t getting the contraception services they need.

Maternal health: Many women are now benefitting from massive improvements in care during pregnancy and childbirth introduced in the last century. But those benefits do not extend everywhere and in 2013, almost 300 000 women died from complications in pregnancy and childbirth. Most of these deaths could have been prevented, had access to family planning and to some quite basic services been in place.

HIV: Three decades into the AIDS epidemic, it is young women who bear the brunt of new HIV infections. Too many young women still struggle to protect themselves against sexual transmission of HIV and to get the treatment they require. This also leaves them particularly vulnerable to tuberculosis – one of the leading causes of death in low-income countries of women 20–59 years.

Sexually transmitted infections: I’ve already mentioned the importance of protecting against HIV and human papillomavirus (HPV) infection (the world’s most common STI). But it is also vital to do a better job of preventing and treating diseases like gonorrhoea, chlamydia and syphilis. Untreated syphilis is responsible for more than 200,000 stillbirths and early foetal deaths every year, and for the deaths of over 90 000 newborns.

Violence against women: Women can be subject to a range of different forms of violence, but physical and sexual violence – either by a partner or someone else – is particularly invidious. Today, one in three women under 50 has experienced physical and/or sexual violence by a partner, or non-partner sexual violence – violence which affects their physical and mental health in the short and long-term. It’s important for health workers to be alert to violence so they can help prevent it, as well as provide support to people who experience it.

Mental health: Evidence suggests that women are more prone than men to experience anxiety, depression, and somatic complaints – physical symptoms that cannot be explained medically. Depression is the most common mental health problem for women and suicide a leading cause of death for women under 60. Helping sensitise women to mental health issues, and giving them the confidence to seek assistance, is vital.

Noncommunicable diseases: In 2012, some 4.7 million women died from noncommunicable diseases before they reached the age of 70 —most of them in low- and middle-income countries. They died as a result of road traffic accidents, harmful use of tobacco, abuse of alcohol, drugs and substances, and obesity — more than 50% of women are overweight in Europe and the Americas. Helping girls and women adopt healthy lifestyles early on is key to a long and healthy life.

Being young: Adolescent girls face a number of sexual and reproductive health challenges: STIs, HIV, and pregnancy. About 13 million adolescent girls (under 20) give birth every year. Complications from those pregnancies and childbirth are a leading cause of death for those young mothers. Many suffer the consequences of unsafe abortion.

Getting older: Having often worked in the home, older women may have fewer pensions and benefits, less access to health care and social services than their male counterparts. Combine the greater risk of poverty with other conditions of old age, like dementia, and older women also have a higher risk of abuse and generally, poor health.

When I lie awake thinking of women and their health globally, I remind myself: the world has made a lot of progress in recent years. We know more, and we are getting better at applying our knowledge. At providing young girls a good start in life.

And there has been an upsurge in high-level political will – evidenced most recently in the United Nations Secretary-General’s Global Strategy for Women’s and Children’s Health. Use of services, especially those for sexual and reproductive health, has increased in some countries. Two important factors that influence women’s health – namely, school enrolment rates for girls and greater political participation of women – have risen in many parts of the world.

But we are not there yet. In 2015, in too many countries, “women’s empowerment” remains a pipedream – little more than a rhetorical flourish added to a politician’s speech. Too many women are still missing out on the opportunity to get educated, support themselves, and obtain the health services they need, when they need them.

That’s why WHO is working so hard to strengthen health systems and ensure that countries have robust financing systems and sufficient numbers of well-trained, motivated health workers. That’s why WHO, with UN and world partners, are coming together at the UN Commission on Status of Women from 9-20 March 2015 in New York. We will look again at pledges made in the 1995 Beijing Declaration and Platform of Action with a view to renewing the global effort to remove the inequalities that put decent health services beyond so many women’s reach.

And that is why WHO and its partners are developing a new global strategy for women’s, children’s and adolescents’ health, and working to enshrine the health of women in the post 2015 United Nations’ Sustainable Development Goals. This means not only setting targets and indicators, but catalysing commitments in terms of policy, financing and action, to ensure that the future will bring health to all women and girls – whoever they are, wherever they live.

Dr Flavia Bustreo, Assistant Director General for Family, Women’s and Children’s Health through the Life-course, World Health Organization,

Register for the Afrocaribbean health event here http://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/celebration-of-afro-caribbean-health-wellness-registration-16119556026
-99% of attendees felt the Afrocaribbean health event was worthwhile and met their specific needs.