Dr Adaeze Ifezulike

Dr Adaeze Ifezulike

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What has Cabbage got to do with Sex?!


Sexual Wellbeing Network

I once watched a chef on Youtube who was demonstrating how to cook cabbage with noodles.When she started listing her ingredients she called cabbage ‘gabbage.’ I assumed I hadn’t heard her right.
“Must have been a slip of tongue,’ I thought “Whoever calls ‘cabbage’ gabbage?”
And then she called it gabbage right till the end!
Well I watched to the end and wasn’t particularly impressed. And to crown it all, she said you could buy her recipe on Amazon! What a nerve! I thought. She is calling ‘cabbage’ gabbage and selling it on Amazon too! Humph!
My enjoyment of her show and appreciation of her culinary expertise had been hindered because I was put off that she was saying the wrong thing.
So what am I on about today? Is this now a cooking blog? : D
But this made me think of the ideas many people have in their heads about sexual intimacy. Some have grown up thinking its a ‘dirty thing’ and this completely spoils their enjoyment of what can be so fulfilling and healthy as well. Sex is relaxing, it de-stresses you, fosters more intimacy between couples – what’s there not to like?!
Our mindset can make or mar our sexual experience.
Sometimes we are just too tired to bother and if one partner wants it but the other pushes them away, that can cause unnecessary conflict in marriage. 
A simple tip: If your partner comes to you and it’s obvious they want sex, but you have been to work, done the school run, cooked the dinner, sang at choir during the evening service and just managed to get the kids off to bed…all you need is some sleep for goodness sake! Yes: I know that feeling!
But give your partner a hug and a small kiss instead of pushing him away and say “Darling I want to make this great for you. Please let me sleep for two hours and I will be all hot for you. I promise.”
It works well for both of you 😉