Why I wrote “Understanding Contraception”

Sexual wellbeing, adaeze Ifezulike, contraceptionThis is my personal story as never told before. Eight years ago, I came to the UK with my husband and two little kids aged four and three.

At the time, I had no steady job and my husband was doing a Masters program at the University. It was very difficult getting used to a new environment, a new language, ‘Scottish English’, and pursuing a training as a Family Physician with practically no childcare arrangements available.

Many migrants reading this can identify with the challenges of settling into a new land.

It was during this hectic, uncertain time that I realised that my period was late! I did a pregnancy test and it was positive!

I was devastated. What should have been a joyful thing was met with dismay on our part because of the challenges we were going through. We were barely coping with two kids in a new land with no childcare and now there was a third one on the way and no regular job between us.image

I realised that as a result of the pressures around me, I had not paid much attention to the issue of contraception. Many women, I am sure, can identify with this.

I was faced with the dilemma of what to do about this pregnancy. We eventually had our little girl and what joy she has brought to us!

But that experience made me realise that we often do not pay much attention to contraception. Its one of those issues that we push to the back of our minds and some how hope all will be okay.

As a family physician, I have come across many women like myself who didn’t give much thought to contraception and then faced the dilemma of an unplanned pregnancy.

The chart below from the latest abortion figures in England and Wales show that recurrent abortion rates in Black women are the highest of all ethnic groups.

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Obviously we are not using contraception as we should. It might be due to misconceptions about the harmful effects of contraception. It might be the ‘hush hush’ manner in which our black communities regard issues of sexuality.

My book ”Understanding Contraception: A guide for Black Ladies” is my attempt to help women take the issue of contraception more seriously. It addresses misconceptions and de-mystifies contraception. It answers the questions you may not have felt bold enough to ask your doctor. It is easy and fun to read with hilarious cartoons by the Caricaturist Rick Coleman.

If after reading the book, you begin to take a hard look at your own attitude towards conception and take the step of practising an effective method of contraception, then my job is done.

Together we can begin to change the statistics and make choices that are right for us.

”Understanding Contraception: A guide for Black Ladies” is available by clicking on the book on this site.

understanng contraception

buy nowCLICK HERE TO GET IT ON AMAZON

Do you want to start reading immediately? Buy the eBook here 

Understanding Contraception E-Book

 

My Contraception failed me!!

A dear friend called me on phone a few days ago. We had talked about contraception in the past and after the birth of her last child she had started using a new method of contraception like any responsible person who didn’t want an unplanned pregnancy.

So I was stunned when she said she had done a pregnancy test and found out she was pregnant despite her contraception.

I know none of the methods are 100% effective (try abstinence or hysterectomy if you must have 100%) but it’s always a huge surprise to me when I meet someone who is the <1% person who will get pregnant despite using an effective method that does not depend on user expertise.
Methods like coils, implants and injections just do the job without any help from you but, very occasionally, they fail.

I could feel her distress and confusion.

What had gone wrong??
She did as she was told and yet….

How do you counsel such a person? What can you say to make it right?

Nothing really except to empathise and crosscheck that they had indeed done everything the right way.

Ensure they attended their three monthly injections on time… check.
They could feel their coil threads after each period and it hadn’t been pulled out with the tampon… check.
The implant can be felt in their arm… check.
The pills were taken regularly, they hadn’t had diarrhoea or vomited and lost the tablet… check.
They used the condom consistently and correctly… check.

So what next?
At this point I let each person go and talk to their spouse and decide on what to do. Only they can make the decision. Whatever decision they arrive at, my role is to support and not judge.

Sexual Wellbeing Network

Sexual Wellbeing Network

And I explain again carefully to the next person how to use a method properly while in my heart hoping and praying that they are not the <1% who the method will fail.

Have you ever been failed by your contraception? What went wrong in your case? And what helped to make things right?

You can also join the conversation on our facebook page http://www.facebook.com/healthysextoday

10 Top Sexual Health Checks to do before the wedding night.

Sexual Wellbeing Network I love weddings, they are so exciting! I always see it as a new beginning for the people involved. It’s an opportunity to celebrate a great life together. It’s a chance to have an amazing adventure with your friend (hopefully you are marrying a friend!)

However before you get to the wedding night, there are 10 sexual health checks you need to do. These are really important and can help to make sexual intimacy a bed of roses for you rather than cause unlimited problems. 1. Forget your past experiences! I cannot emphasise this enough. Whether you’ve had sex in the past or not, this is a new start! It’s time to forget your past and reach out for the future. The past experiences, especially the negative ones, can have the power to destroy the new heaven ahead of you. So it’s really important to forget the past and determine to enjoy the glorious sweetness ahead of you. You may have had nasty experiences like rape in the past. Well it’s time to dust yourself down and determine that that won’t destroy your future. You need to decide that from now on, you are going to have an excellent sexual life. You may have shared sexual intimacy with people who didn’t value you, who were just interested in what was in it for themselves. Forget them! Do not let your past experiences mar the beauty of what is to come. Sexual intimacy can be beautiful and satisfying but the last thing you need is a head and heart full of bad memories. So if you have had nasty experiences in the past, leave them there. Your marriage is a new beginning. It can be difficult to do this and some people may find they require counselling. In this case, get some counselling before you go into marriage. Go and speak to a trained counsellor and get help with facing up to your past experiences. They do not need to have a hold over you anymore. I strongly encourage young people to avoid sexual intimacy till they are married, if possible. I know this message is not for everyone but for those who would listen, it’s really best to avoid unnecessary baggage. The last thing you want is to be making love with your spouse and be thinking ‘he doesn’t quite measure up to Jide or Samson’. Ladies, you don’t want your spouse thinking, ‘she doesn’t quite do it like Elizabeth Taylor or the girl down at the store.’ It’s best you discover each other as you are and go from there. That way, sexual intimacy can be like a treasure chest.You are discovering each other without the added complication of previous experiences.

But if you’ve had previous experiences, then try to put them aside and enjoy what you have before you. A lot of dissatisfaction in marriage stems from current spouses not living up to what one may have experienced in the past. 2. Talk about contraception. This is very important. Many people go into marriage without ever discussing contraception yet somewhere in their mind, they know they are not ready for a baby. I’ve seen couples who were planning to go overseas to further their education. They do not factor in how having a baby at that time can cause problems. There are childcare challenges if you are having to attend lectures or meet thesis deadlines. If you need one year or two to do your Masters programme or whatever it is you want to do, then mutually agree with your partner on what you want to do about childbearing. Perhaps you may agree to use contraception for the next year until you finish your study or set up your business or whatever it is. Then you can be better prepared for the challenges of having a baby. It’s better to be ready than have the baby and find that you are running helter-skelter. You cannot finish your studies, you cannot take care of your baby… You feel frustrated just because you did not stop to plan. If you don’t plan, you have planned to fail!

All contraceptions are reversible apart from sterilization so there is no reason not to choose one if you wish to delay child bearing for a while. And there are a number to choose from. If one doesn’t suit you, go on to another one till you find one that suits.

3. Do a HIV test. HIV is so common among the black population that many organisations and churches that conduct marriages now strongly encourage their members to have a HIV test before the occasion. This is good practice and I strongly encourage it. No one wants to break up your relationship! It’s better to know and get treatment rather than going into a relationship when you are HIV positive, infecting your partner and, worse still, passing the infection onto a new-born baby.

So do a HIV test. Tell your partner ”I’ve done a HIV test and I would like you to do one too, please.” That way, you both know where you stand. If either of you is positive, well, then you know! There is a solution and help out there. So do a HIV test before you get married. Better still, do it before the two of you get intimate. See where you both stand!

While you are at it, why not check for other STDs (sexually transmitted infections) like chlamydia and gonorrhoea. This is especially important if you have engaged in casual sex in the past. It often just requires a cotton wool swab for samples from your vagina or a simple urine sample for men. The good news is that many of these infections can be treated easily with antibiotics.

Untreated chlamydia can lead to miscarriage, constant pelvic pain and even infertility. So do an STD check before sexual intimacy.

4. Check for Hepatitis B and C. These infections are a big threat to our health. They often go hand in hand with HIV and are common in Africans. The African Collaborative Hepatitis Network states that ”Viral hepatitis remains a major global health threat that desperately needs increased public awareness.” You can find out about their work here. It is estimated that 15% of Africans have Hepatitis B compared with 1% of Americans.

It can be transmitted from unscreened blood transfusions, injecting drugs, sexual intercourse and from mother to child during childbirth. Many children who get it from their mothers become chronic carriers of hepatitis and this can cause liver problems such as liver cancer in later life. So this is an important test to do. In most hospitals, the same blood sample is used to test both hepatitis and HIV.

If one partner is positive, the other partner can be vaccinated against hepatitis and this reduces the risk of catching it from each other. There is treatment for Hepatitis C which has a cure rate of about 80%. There is also treatment which can be taken for Hepatitis B and these can slow down the progression of the infection so that it should not cause liver damage.

5. Sort out any outstanding women’s health issues. A very important one is Female Genital Mutilation (FGM). This barbaric practice which is prevalent in many Black Communities can cause a lot of sexual problems. The amazing work being done by FORWARD (Foundation for Women’s Health Research and Development) in stopping this horrible practice is highly laudable. You can read all about FORWARD here. For those who are not familiar with this, some cultures believe that to reduce sexual immorality among women, they need to have certain parts of their genitals cut off usually when the girl child is about eight years old. Unfortunately, there can be immediate complications such as bleeding and infections as these practices are often done in unsanitary conditions. There is often no analgesia or anaesthetic administered during the procedure, causing untold distress to these young girls. But more importantly, terrible scarring around the vagina can follow and lead to difficulty during sexual intercourse and childbirth. In extreme cases, the scarring can completely cover the private parts so that menstrual blood cannot come out.

If you have ever had this procedure, please see a doctor to be examined as some of the damage may be amenable to surgical repair. The FORWARD website gives a lot of information and advice on this condition. On a lighter note, if your period is predictable, you may want to plan ahead and ensure that your wedding night doesn’t find you ‘raining red’. I don’t think the groom will be very pleased!

6. Expect to get involved. Good quality sexual intimacy requires the involvement of both parties! Don’t approach sex with the attitude of ‘what’s in it for me?’ Ladies: don’t just lie in bed while the groom huffs and puffs. Have you ever tried to till concrete? How much more easy to sow on yielding soil. Be involved! Move your hips. Dance with the rhythm. Don’t be shy to say where you would like to be touched. Don’t be afraid to reach and feel – you belong to each other now. You are his Juliet and he is your Romeo. So go for it. Let the bellows blast fully and you will enjoy glorious sexual intimacy.

7. Get some lubricant from any pharmacy. Small detail but could make a whole lot of difference. The excitement of finally being free to explore each other can lead to a rush – yet the best sex is a marathon rather than a sprint. If the lady is still a bit dry when the groom dives in, it can be quite painful for her. You don’t want to start with a painful experience. So lubricate liberally as required. Taking some time to touch each other, kissing, petting and speaking loving words before the actual penetration can ensure that the vagina becomes naturally lubricated. But if this doesn’t happen, the lubricant can come in very handy.

8. Be clean! Cleanliness is very important in sexual intimacy. There is nothing as off-putting as smelly armpits or dirty hair at the time of intercourse. Ladies: especially make sure the area between your legs is shaved – it doesn’t have to be clean shaven but at least let the hairs not be so long that the man doesn’t even know where to put his penis or give you the pleasure you need. Shave and keep clean so that when it’s time, the feast is ready. Shave your armpits, wash your hair. If you use extensions or wear wigs, pack these neatly in a hair net: you wouldn’t want bits to fall off during the act and scare the groom out of his wits thinking he has decapitated you!

Make it a habit to shower before sexual intimacy and this way, every part of your body becomes available for the mutual feast. This applies to men also! Get some nice perfume!

9. Get as fit as you can! Are you overweight? Do you regularly find an excuse not to exercise? Make some changes! Physical fitness greatly enhances sexual enjoyment. What sort of food do you eat? This can affect your energy levels. Try to eat more fruits and vegetables as they are packed full of lovely nutrients that can energise your sex drive. If you take regular medications, speak with your doctor and ensure they do not affect your sex drive. Some medications like anti-depressants and some drugs for treating hypertension can affect your sex drive. Your doctor might be able to switch you to something else so get a medication check.

10. Have fun! Enjoy yourself. Do you know that sex has a lot of health benefits? It reduces blood pressure, de-stresses you, helps you have a good sleep, makes you feel younger, improves your immune system, releases hormones that can counteract anxiety/depression and can foster closeness with your spouse. How cool is that!

So make up your mind to have fun. You can do it, nobody else can create your sexual heaven but you. You have to determine in your heart and mind to make it happen, that you are going to be part of the activity and not just lie there like a log of wood. Be an active participant.

Remember, this is your own love story. You are his Juliet and he is your Romeo. This is your moment, give it all you can. Let it be a beautiful symphony you both can enjoy and that way, sexual intimacy can give amazing joys you could only have dreamt of.

Now you have the 10 top sexual health checks to do, feel free to add yours in the comment section below 😀 Click here to like us on facebook and invite your friends too. Thanks :))

A Challenge to Black Men.

Massive thanks to all who participated in our poll on contraception. Your involvement makes your feelings clear and once we know what our feelings are, we can change them in positive ways. Never forget that you have a voice and ‘We must be the change we wish to see in the world’ – Gandhi.

So please watch out for the next poll and take part in it.  The result of the poll is given below in a bar chart -a picture speaks louder than many words!

contraception

The majority of the respondents, 64%, felt it was a woman’s duty, 32% felt it was a man’s duty and just 5% felt it was the doctors’ duty to sort out the issue of contraception. None of the respondents thought  that a mother-in-law or father-in-law had any say in the matter, thankfully!

This is the traditional view and holds no surprises.

But I beg to differ!

With soaring abortion rates and unprecedented levels of sexually transmitted infections including HIV/AIDs, I lay the issue of contraception squarely at the Man’s door!!

Check out some statistics:

Of all the women living with AIDS, 64% are estimated to be Black women!!

AIDS continues to be the leading cause of death for black women aged 25-44(greater than death caused by heart disease, cancer and homicide!!)

You can read more here

Men, the time for ‘Bang, bang and bye’ has passed.

  •  I challenge men who know they have a sexually transmitted infection to ‘PUT ON A CONDOM’ and protect their partners.
  • I challenge men who know they engage in risky sexual behaviour to ‘GET TESTED FOR HIV AND HEPATITIS ANUALLY’ at the barest minimum.
  • I challenge men who no longer want to have children to ‘GET STERILIZED’ and help beat down the soaring abortion rates and high levels of unplanned pregnancies.
  • I challenge men who are approached by young girls to ‘REFUSE SEXUAL INTERCOURSE’ with these vulnerable girls and encourage the girls to go back to their studies and make something of their lives.
  • I challenge men who no longer want children to stop and ask their partners ‘WHAT CONTRACEPTION ARE YOU ON?’ and if you don’t get a satisfactory answer, take time to find out why and if need be, come to the family planning clinic with the lady. Statistics show that women take  the issue of contraception seriously if their partners are involved in the decision.

As usual, you can comment below. Feel free to share this with your network and help make a difference.

Now I have told you my opinion, what is yours??

Sterilisation? That’s castration, right??

Last week we found out that Amina and her husband decided to go for an abortion. The last post can be read here https://adaezeifezulike.wordpress.com/2013/10/06/its-my-wifes-fault/

In the UK, the organisation that regulates doctors (called the General Medical Council or GMC for short) recognises that some doctors may have a conscientious objection to some procedures, such as abortion. The GMC’s guidance is clear: whatever a doctor’s beliefs may be, the doctor MUST signpost patients to where they can get the help they require. So even if the doctor has conscientious objections, they have to send you to someone who will help you. This must be done without delay and in a non-judgemental manner.
So I directed Amina to colleagues who ensured that she got what she wanted.

She was back with her husband, Baako, to see me the following week. This time, she was determined that the issue of contraception must be sorted.

“I’m never ever going to have another abortion. I think two is enough!”

positive steps

“Okay. So what do you want to use?”

“Well…” She shuffled her feet as she thought it over.

“I’m not going to be sterilised,” her husband cut in, “so forget that.”

Amina looked at him angrily. “What’s the matter with you? What are you afraid of? We’ve got the number of children we want, why don’t you get sterilised?”

“Why should I be the one to be sterilised?” He shot back.

I decided it was time to make a suggestion. “Perhaps you can tell me what you are worried about and we can talk about it.”

“Look doctor, this is what makes a man a man! I cannot go and be castrated like a dog or a bull: I am a man!”

“Okay,” I said, trying not to smile. I saw Amina roll her eyes in exasperation.

“Any other concerns?”

“Besides, it’s just these Oyibo people that introduced all these things. How would a man open his mouth and tell his kinsmen that he is sterilised? How would that sound, doctor? How would that sound?”

“I see. Anything else?”
“Are these not enough reasons, doctor? And besides…”
“Yes, go on…”

“Yes!” Amina chipped in. “Tell the doctor, tell her!”
“What if…”
“He is afraid that the children and I may die.”

“I don’t mean it like that! Shut up woman! But doctor, you know what I mean… supposing something happens to my wife and children, what will happen to me then, eh? Does it mean I will not then have the capacity to impregnate a woman again?”

“I hear all your concerns and will take them one by one. Let’s start with the first one.’
“You said that this is what makes a man, a man… Well, I think there is more to a man than being able to impregnate a woman. I guess you are worried about your erection and being able to make love to your wife. I want to reassure you that sterilisation does not affect that ability at all. When you are sterilised, your tubes are tied but the penis is not affected and you should still have a strong erection and achieve penetration with your wife. Do you understand?”

“Are you sure, doctor? You know you people say one thing and then do another thing.”

“I assure you that your normal erection and sexual drive is not affected when you are sterilised. In fact some women enjoy sex more because they are not worrying about getting pregnant.”
“Okay, if you say so.”

“Your other concern was about what people will say. Yes, it’s still a foreign concept and not one that everyone understands or agrees with. So it might be best to keep it to yourself. You don’t have to tell anybody what goes on in your bedroom. It’s not their business, is it?”
“No.”

“Besides, something foreign doesn’t have to be evil. Remember that Mary Slessor came and stopped the killing of twins in black communities. It was a foreign concept among our people who felt that twins were evil. But we know now that she was right. So sterilisation is foreign to our culture but that does not mean it is wrong.”

“Okay. What of my third concern?”
“Well, you wondered what may happen if your wife and children should die.”

“What if you die, eh? Why must it be the children and I who die?” Amina interjected.

“Well, I understand your concern,” I answered Baako, “and again, this fear is rooted in our culture. In the past, we had many children because many of them died from diseases and poor living conditions. We had twelve, sixteen and even twenty children and in the end perhaps five survived. But now, things have improved. So if you follow that same mentality and have ten children, you may find that ten of them survive. So one shouldn’t have many children out of fear that some of them might not survive. It doesn’t work like that anymore. Does that answer your question?”

“Yes, okay. I will think about it but I still prefer condoms…”

“Eh… but condoms failed us,” said Amina.

“Whose fault is that?”

“Perhaps we should talk about condoms just to balance things up and see why they failed?” I asked.

My discussion with them concerning condoms and how to use them correctly and consistently will follow soon. Please stay tuned and dont forget to tell your friends (and foes!) about the blog 😉

Remember to send in your comments in the comment section just below this post. Our contraception poll will be closing soon. If you haven’t participated, you can still do so here https://adaezeifezulike.wordpress.com/2013/10/01/lets-know-what-you-think/

So what are your own thoughts about sterilization? Have you or your husband been sterilized? How did it go? Do you regret your decision? Or is it the best thing that has happened to you? What will it take for you to be sterilized?

Please tell us….we are desperate to know 😀

It’s my wife’s fault!

So Amina came back to see me as planned. If you are new to the blog, please read the previous articles here https://adaezeifezulike.wordpress.com/2013/09/25/contraception-to-ignore-it-or-tackle-it-that-is-the-question-2/ and also https://adaezeifezulike.wordpress.com/2013/09/30/youre-pregnant-congratulations-or-not/.

This time, I was pleased to see that she’d brought her husband with her. Studies show that if men are involved in making decisions about contraception, the women are more likely to continue with the method jointly chosen and are more tolerant of side effects. So ladies, take your husband along with you to the family planning clinic if you can.

After they both sat down and we finished with the pleasantries, the husband said: “I came so I can see this doctor who is suggesting adoption to my wife.” He was angry. “How could you even suggest such a thing?”

I gave Amina my best what-have-you-been-telling-your-husband look. I was taken aback.

“How would she carry the pregnancy? Everybody will see her pregnant and then what will we say to people when there is no baby in the end?”

‘I won’t let anyone know I am pregnant…’ Amina ventured timidly.

‘Indeed, when you start spitting all over the place, how won’t people know? And when the tummy starts showing, what would you say is inside there? Food?’

I stifled my laughter.

“We were just discussing possible options to abortion,” I explained. “I do the same with any woman who presents for an abortion; but of course the ultimate decision lies with you and we are here to help whatever your decision. I just try to make sure you’ve thought things through.’

I could see him visibly relax as I explained.

“Abortion is not like having your tooth taken out, you know.”

“Okay, I see,” he said, his voice quieter.

“All this wouldn’t have happened if she’d been more careful,” he continued gesturing at Amina.

“Me?!” Amina recoiled at the accusation. I could see tears forming.

“How do you mean?” I asked.

“’Doctor please tell her she needs to ensure she doesn’t keep getting pregnant. Even little girls of 16 years know how to not get pregnant.”

“What do you think you could do to help the situation?”

“Me?”’ He was thrown by my question. “But this is her responsibility. She is the one getting pregnant.”

“Have you ever considered getting sterilised?”

“What?! First you talked of adoption, now you are saying sterilisation! Surely you don’t understand our ways even though you are one of us. A man doesn’t get sterilised.”

“Okay, I look forward to discussing that at another time with you but, for now, let’s hear what you’ve decided to do about this pregnancy.”

“Abortion of course.”

I looked at Amina to get her consent. “Yes doctor, we will go for an abortion,” she said quietly.

“Okay.”

“So what do we do next?” She asked.

I shall be discussing what happens on the next blog so be sure to click the follow button so you don’t miss out.

What do you think about male sterilization?

Consider these statistics from the World Health Organisation (WHO) 2013 on contraceptive use. The percentages using male sterilisation for different countries are as below:

Canada 22%

UK         17%

Namibia 0.8%

South Africa 0.7%

Uganda  0.1%

Zambia 0.1%

It’s obvious that the concept of male sterilisation hasn’t taken root among black communities.

Should we be promoting male sterilisation? What do you think is the reason why black men do not go for sterilisation even when they are sure their families are complete?

Don’t forget to participate in the poll on contraception here https://adaezeifezulike.wordpress.com/2013/10/01/lets-know-what-you-think/. I value your input immensely. You are the reason for the Blog! Thank you for reading.

Feel free to leave a comment in the comment section. Till next post, stay strong!

Dr Adaeze.

You’re pregnant! Congratulations! (Or not?)

A warm welcome to today’s post! I trust you have had a great time since the last blog and that you are already inspired to take positive measures towards better sexual well being.

positive steps

Why not let other black sisters know what new steps you’ve taken. Drop a comment in the box below and you can also let me know if there are any burning sexual health issues you would like to discuss.

One of the commonest things ladies ask me about is contraception. Once I have been introduced to a woman and she learns that I am a doctor, the very next chance she has, she pulls me aside and say ‘Oh doctor, I have been meaning to see someone about this, please what contraception should I be using?’

People want answers to medical issues that they face daily and that is a good thing. The more informed we are, the more equipped we are to make positive choices.

This blog looks at sexual health issues. Make sure you click the ‘follow’ button so you don’t miss out on any posts.

So – do you remember Amina?-(If you haven’t met Amina, please read my earlier blog at https://adaezeifezulike.wordpress.com/2013/09/25/contraception-to-ignore-it-or-tackle-it-that-is-the-question-2/).

She found herself with an unplanned pregnancy and had come to the family planning clinic to request an abortion. This happens only too frequently.

We had established that Amina used condoms sometimes and nothing at other times. We will be focusing on condom use in a later post… so watch out!

“So how would you want to proceed from here?” I asked, gently.

“What else can I do, doctor? Abortion is my only option! We couldn’t possibly afford a fourth child,” her eyes brimmed over with tears again.

“How would you feel if I mentioned some option?”

“Like what, doctor?”                                                                                                                  “What are your thoughts about adoption?”

“What! Have the child and then give it away? God forbid!” She exclaimed. “Our culture does not support adoption…You should know that, doctor,” she ended reproachfully.

“Well, more and more black families are choosing to adopt children, especially those who can’t have their own kids,” I replied with a smile.

“I really don’t know about that. I don’t think I could go down that route, doctor. Any more options?” She asked hopefully.

“What about keeping the pregnancy?”

She shook her head slowly and gave a loud sigh. “We can’t afford another child, really. But I will discuss adoption with my husband and see what he thinks.”

“Ultimately the decision is yours and we are here to help. It’s only fair I highlight other options to you and you can let me know what you decide to do. Shall I see you back in two days or a week’s time?”

She booked an appointment for a week’s time.

When faced with an unplanned pregnancy, what do you do? Many black communities see adoption as something foreign and that means that option is not even considered in many cases. Should we encourage more adoption? What are your views?

What other options are there to abortion?
abortionWhat would you put in the fourth small circle on the left? Remember: the whole point of this blog is to prevent you from getting to the point where you face an unplanned pregnancy in the first place. Effective use of contraception will help this.

Amina came back to see me a week later. I am sure you would want to know what she decided to do so please stay tuned.

Until next time, have a great week!

Dr Adaeze.